1. What is LOVE (in your opinion)?
For platonic love: deeply caring for the wellbeing of another person. Connecting with them
on an emotional, and sometimes intellectual, level.
For romantic love: all of the above, with the addition of a physical longing for the object of
your affections, often, although not always, accompanied by a desire to possess that person to
some degree, for them to belong to you, to belong to each other.
When I think of love, I think of romantic love. That’s nice to know, so thank you for the
2. Do you believe in love?
These days, in the same way an agnostic believes in God, if that makes any sense.
3. What are your dreams re above?
I stopped dreaming about romantic love a few years ago; it just never seems to work out. I
figure if it turns up one day that will be a nice surprise.
4. Who was your (childhood) sweetheart?
The heart surgeon’s son from down the street. We were thirteen. He asked my permission
before he gave me my first kiss. It was a strangely clinical experience; he seemed to be
focused on his technique, which was actually pretty appalling. I eventually decided he loved
his skateboard more than he loved me, which looking back on myself at thirteen is entirely
5. When did you first feel butterflies in your tummy?
Primary school. What used to be known as standard 3. Sitting next to a boy called Brett
discussing my science project. I’m sure the butterflies were mine alone. I was a truly
unfortunate looking child.
6. Were you ever besotted with anyone? Why and for how long?
My first proper boyfriend, who I met at age 15. It took me ten years to get over him. I have
no idea why, he was a tosser. I’ll blame adolescent hormonal imbalances.
7. What has changed for you now (present day) with the word ‘love’?
It makes me roll my eyes now.
8. Have your ever written love poetry? Or love notes?
A ghastly poem about the first boyfriend. Cringe. Thankfully I kept it to myself.
9. Do you believe in love at first sight?
Yes. It has happened to me twice.
10. What is the most (important) lesson you have learnt through your life, when it comes to
love? Please be specific:)
I tend to value my freedom more than I value love these days. Specifically, I have learned
that I am not good at compromising; it feels like a defeat and sometimes requires trust that
can be hard to give. Most relationships require some degree of compromise, and I would only
ever want an equal partnership, so this should be a natural part of the deal. It doesn’t come
naturally to me. I have a strong sense of wanting to be fair to others, so this is a stumbling
block; perhaps it makes me see something in myself that I don’t really want to see.